Review: Various Artists: Top Cat, White Tie & Tails (Guide Cats for the Blind, vol 3) Songs and Poems of Les Barker

This, the third of Les Barker's albums produced for charity, is just as witty and thought provoking as its predecessors. Twenty-seven tracks, from 7 secs to 3:58 in length, guaranteed to raise both a smile and much-needed funds for the British Computer Association of the Blind.

On my first listen, it struck me that no-one can read Les Barker like Les Barker. Fortunately there is one track on the CD where Les reads his poem The Church Of The Wholly Undecided. Even more fortunately I had a second and a third listen. But not until after I had had a revelation. I went to the Mrs Ackroyd website and read the Shipping Forecast. In my head it was still absolutely hilarious. In fact at first I had to stop because I kept laughing out loud and I was at work. So I tried again when I got home. Hilarious. His poetry exists out there and does not depend on him. Perhaps it's just that his sense of timing gives it that certain something.

Anyway, these people gathered to read Les's poetry for charity so even when their timing is a bit suspect, like Dave Cash on a brilliant pastiche of Deck Of Cards, they remain charming.

Highlights are a poem made up entirely of puns on writers' names (The Author's Story), one about the problems inherent in calling your dogs Go, Stay and Fetch (Go, Stay And Fetch) and another about the problems of phoning BT to tell them your phone's not working (My Phone's Out Of Order). Bemusement appears to be Barker's mood de jour. There's Jenny Agutter - prepare to fall in love with her all over again when she reads Bungee Jumping For Lemmings or Garden Waste. You'll never use your composter again. And Prunella Scales is gorgeous (but in a different way to Ms Agutter) with a monologue that we've all heard while waiting to be served by a shop assistant too busy chatting with a friend (No May).

In short, hilarious.

(Published by Osmosys Records, OSMO CD 041)

18th Annual Ruskin House Folk & Blues Festival

This Saturday, July 5, Ruskin House's Sunday evening Acoustic Club is hosting its Annual Folk & Blues Festival in the gardens of the house in Coombe Road, Croydon, Surrey. The house is much more quaint than that address would lead you to believe.

The festival will feature many of the regular musicians who play at the club, along with a team of dancers from the McPartland School of Irish Dancing, a Scottish pipe band, bouncy castle, barbecue and real ales. Noon to 11pm. Admission £3, accompanied children (up to age 16) free.

See here for a map. Or here for more details of the club. A donation will be made to St Christopher's Hospice.